An Ill Wind Blows from the West
by Odyssues
Summary: ED and AL are on the run from the Military. While looking for a way to turn Ed back to normal.Or so it seemed untill Naruto showed up and the Military came Humoculli atacked and Ninjas all come for the same thing.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own FMA like Duh or Naruto (who does)

Chapter 1

Introductions

Danielle (Lana) was trying to concentrate on the new scroll, she was copying from the Konohagakure village "The Village Hidden in the Leaves" for her older brother. When she heard something, "You're doing it wrong. It's supposed to be done like this." "NO! This is better!" Fire burned in her eyes as she stood up with negative energy spreading across the room. She walked over to the window and threw it open. Temporally blinded by the light, she shielded her eyes from the sun. She looked down at the courtyard to find it covered with mist with two nude women in the middle of it. Anger grew with-in her. She was ready to explode. "How could they be doing this again!"

"**WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" **Suddenly the mist vanished and in a puff of smoke the two women turned in to two young boys. One boy had spiky blond hair and blue eyes and was wearing an orange jumpsuit. The other boy also had spiky hair except his was light brown like his eyes. He was wearing a dark blue T-shirt with navy blue shorts. "**NARUTO, JUSTIN WHY ARE YOU PRACTICING THE NINJA CENTER FOLD!" **yelled Lana.Naruto and Justin looked up startled at Lana. They hadn't seen her this mad since they ruined one of her alchemy books. Lana stood their glaring at them considering the ways to torture them. She looked around the room to see what she had to work with. She spotted a heavy dictionary. An evil grin crossed her face. Justin knowing his sister all to well ran for cover. Unfortunately Naruto still hadn't been in the Fletcher household long enough to know what was going to happen next. What's wrong Jus…? TONK! Naruto fell on the floor unconscious. Justin looked at Naruto on the floor. He had a huge bump on his head and a dictionary lying not too far away. I always knew learning was bad for you thought Justin. "**JUST YOU WAIT JUSTIN I'M GOING TO GET YOU!"** roaredLana.

Meanwhile, the sun was setting on the horizon behind two teenagers as they walked slowly on the dirt rode. RUMMBLE! "Al I'm so hungry." said the teenager with long braided blond hair and golden eyes. Grabbing his stomach in anguish. "Look. The old lady said where almost there." Said the person known as Al who had long sandy colored hair tied back in a pony tail. "But you told me that five min…" THUMP! Edward face planted onto the floor. "Brother!" Cried Al running over to him. Ed stood up quickly, "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!" he yelled knocking over Al. Ed then noticed a dead corps lying on the floor. "I tripped over a DEAD CORPSE!" he yelled jumping back. "Brother" Al began while carefully getting up. "When have you ever seen a corpse that's not dead in the first place?" _Then it moved_ "Brother did t-the corpse just move?" He said while backing up. Ed stared at Al "Have you been drinking milk, that's stuff evil you know?"

The thing slowly turned its head and looked at them through green eyes. "AHHHHHHHHHH! THE DAMNED things moving." Ed screamed as "the corpse" slowly stood up. Brushing off his camouflaged pants and stamping his Jump boot clad feet. "Why are you guys freaking out?" he said lazily. Ed and Al's jaws dropped. "IT'S ALIVE!" Yelled the brothers in unison as Ed pointed. "Yeah I guess…. Is there, a problem with that?" he asked while rubbing his black hair. He squinted "You aren't from around here are you?" "The dead things talking Al" Ed said but before he could continue… GRUMBLE! He fell to his knees "I need **FOOOOOOOOOOD!**" he cried in anguish (again). "_Well if you're really hungry._" He began slowly. Ed stood up and Al leaned forward tacking in every word. "_I could"_. "YES" said the two brothers listening to every word. "_Bring you". "_Yah! Yah!" said the two weary travelers._ "To my place" _he added happily "Come on Al, lets goooooo!" Ed raced of down the rode with dust trailing behind him.

"Sorry you must excuse my brother for not introducing himself. My name is Alfonse Elric and your's." Al introduced. The man stopped and shrugged "Staff Sergeant Fletcher C. Adrian ABT 000115121375 United State Marine Corps." Al stopped walking "You're in the military?" "HELL YEAH!" Adrian mumbled. "Then prepare you're self!" Al lunched his body at Adrian readying his fist for a strike.

Authors note:

Author1 (A 1): HELLO, just to let you know the Naruto Stuff is based off the comic books. So the ninja center fold is the sexy jutsu (I think). And for future reference the art of the Doppelgangers is Shadow Clone Jutsu.

Author2 (A2): Heeelllooo is this thing on?

A1: DUH!

A2: Yah! Ok let me begin because this is taking place after the whole philosophers stone Shiscabob thingy so thing are a little bit different.

1 Al has his body YAH!

A1: That was lame.

A2: Humph. As I was saying…

2 Ed still has mechanical arm and leg. Because he gave it up for Al to get back has brother in human form BOHOO! For you that don't know Al was the Philosopher Stone DUMDUM! So Al gave up his body for ED.

A1: This is a REALY long Authors note.

A2: SHUTUP! Number three …………. Writers block.

A1: Fine I'll do it

A2…Err. Okay. But summarize quickly!

A1: Number 3

Winry has a boyfriend. Poor Al! SOB! SOB!

Number 4

Rose is dead. Poor Ed (not really, I never liked her)

A2: For a quick conclusion will tell about Naruto and the gang in the next Chapter.

A1: Review or no more chapters for you!


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own FMA, Naruto

Chapter 2

Pancakes

Adrian jumped back barley missing Al's fist. Al swung again this time he made contact to Adrian's lower jaw. Adrian stumbled back just as Al swung a roundhouse kick to his head, but this time he was ready. Adrian watched the blow coming to his head and right before it collided he jumped off the rode into bush. POOF! Al froze, _what was that_ he thought. Then out of the bush came his brother Edward Elric. "What's wrong Al?" Ed asked confused. "Brother that guy's in the Mill…" Ed quickly moved behind Al. Al tried to turn around. WACK! Stars burst into his eyes as a boot made contact with his lower neck. He sank to his knees and watched his brother smile at him. Then every thing went black.

"Al! Al! Wake up all ready!" Al slowly opened his eyes to see his brother sitting next to him. The first thing he did was… POW! "Al why the HELL did you hit me for" yelled Ed.

"Well you're the one who tried to kill me" said Al in an obvious tone. "I never tried to kill you" said Ed rubbing his cheek. "Did I miss something?" asked Adrian entering the room. "You… why are you here!" asked a very confused Al. "It seems we had a misinterpretation" said Adrian lazily. "I don't work for the military _you know_". "Oh" said Al as he turned a light shade of pink. "How embarrassing."

"Any one who wants to eat better come now or go hungry till lunch", came a scream from outside the door. "Lunch" Al asked himself. "Come on Al" said Ed happily. Al and Ed stood up and walked to the door. You could smell the sweet aroma of Pancakes with maple syrup. "Who wants pancakes?" said a girl smiling. She had long light brown hair with natural highlights down to her waist. She was wearing a short blue dress just above her knees. The dress had a cut on both sides reveling her thighs with black shorts underneath. She looked like Rose but younger and without the pink hair. There were also two young boys sitting at the table fighting over who will get the first pancake. Then every one suddenly stopped talking when they noticed that Ed and Al had entered the room. "So… you are?" asked Naruto. "Some hobos I find on my way here" answered Adrian. "We're NOT hobos!" screamed Ed, "And we fond you". "Whatever" said Adrian with a wave of his hand.

"Well anyways my name is Lana" said Lana happily and this is Naruto and Justin as she pointed at the boys fighting over the first pancake. "It's mine imbecile!" Justin yelled as he pulled hard on the pancake. Naruto just let go with a smug smile. "AHH!" Justin yelled as he went flying back, and collided with Lana! Lana flew to the side throwing pancakes in the air. Ed and Al looked up. SPLAT! A pancake landed on Ed's face while Al stepped to the side and watched sadly as his landed on the floor. Adrian sat down at the table and with one motion grabbed a pancake and put syrup on it and began eating it with a knife and fork. Lana sat on the floor an angry look crossing her face then SPLAT! SPLAT! SPLAT! Four pancakes landed on Lana's head and slowly slid off the plate came falling afterwards but she cot it in a single motion. Adrian threw an Army Helmet on and took out his most recent copy of PLAY BOY! Naruto began to laugh at Lana as she stood up but quickly become quiet. Naruto took a steep back "TAKE THIS!" she yelled and threw the plate. "Substitution Justu!" yelled Naruto. POOF! In his place now stood Justin "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" he yelled, then CRACK! The plate made contact with his head. Justin fell to the floor with a THUD! Naruto looked down at Justin's unconscious form. Then he looked at Lana and took off running for the door. But before Lana could run after him Edward jumped in the way. "What the hell was that all about?" Lana stopped in front of him and looked at him with a questioning look in her eyes. "You've never seen a Justu?" she asked. "Most of the people in this region have never seen it either", came Adrian's lazy voice. "Who asked you!" she shrieked as she threw a throwing knife at Adrian. It glanced of his helmet as he turned the page of his magazine. "what-ever" he drawled.

She looked back at Edward. "Is that true?" she asked once again. "I don't even know what the hell is going on." He said. Lana looked taken aback. "What's your name any ways?" Edward inhaled and puffed out his chest "I'm the Full Metal Alchemist also known as Edward Elric" Lana's face beamed "You're the Full Metal!" she said jumping up in down with joy. "Who the hell is that?" Adrian added as he took off his helmet. "**SHUT UP YOU!**" she yelled once again and looked for something to throw at him. After her search ended up fruitless she looked at Ed and cocked he head to the side and mentioned "I'd always thought you'd be _taller_."

"WHO THE HELL YOU CALLING SHORT WHEN YOU"RE SHORTER THAN ME!" he thundered. **"MEEEEEEEEE!" "I'M FIVE FOOT THREE YOU CHIBI SIZED** **ALCHEMIST!"** she yelled back veins popping out in her neck. "WHY YOU DIRTY…" Ed never finished because Naruto had snuck up behind him grabbed his right hand kicked in his knee caps throwing him to the floor and placed a knife to his neck. "What was that?" he growled as he pressed the knife closer to Edward's neck. "Brother!" Al yelled as he took a step forward but was suddenly thrown to the wall and pinned to the wall as Adrian held a 45 Cal ACP pistol to his neck. "Brother didn't mean it." Al moaned. Lana stood there taken aback, her eye brow twitched. When suddenly, the door flew open with a SLAM! There stood Lana's most resent teacher and Adrian's friend Kakashi sensei. Beside stood Sakara Haruno with long flamboyant pink hair with the same clothes as Lana except red. On his other side stood bored looking Sasuke Uchiha with his black hair and blue short sleeve sweater.

Lana stood there, her anger growing. Naruto stood up and took a step back letting Ed go. Justin slowly opened his eyes and looked at Lana then quickly played dead. Sasuke's face showed a little bit of amusement at watching Naruto cowering in front of Lana. While Sakara wished she could control Naruto like Lana. Kakashi got bored and took out a book called Make out Paradise Vol.4 and began to read. "Adrian let Al go." Lana said in an evil voice. Adrian let Alphonse go and took out a _Play Boy_ magazine. "I can't believe their reading at a time like this" thought Lana angrily. **"EVERYONE SIT DOWN!"** boomed Lana ready to kill someone. Everyone sat down immediately (even Justin) except Adrian and Kakashi. She glared at them and started reaching for her shuriken holster. Kakashi and Adrian exchanged looks and shrugged. They slowly walked to the table and took a seat. Lana then walked to the head of the table. "Now" she started looking slightly irritated. "I have a few questions", she said calmly. "First what's your name", she asked as she glared at Al. "I'm Alphonse Elric", answered Al. "Now tell me how come you where all beat up when you got here", asked Lana. "Well I thought Adrian worked for the military in our region", said Al slightly embarrass. "So are you on the run from the military" asked Lana interested.

"Yes"

"Why?"

"W-well", he stammered. Seeing how he didn't want to tell she said, "You don't have to say it if you don't want to." Naruto was getting angry because he wasn't the center of the conversation. "CAN WE GET ON WITH THIS", yelled Naruto. Adrian and Kakashi looked at Naruto and threw their books at him. "AAAH WHAT WAS THAT FOR", snapped Naruto. Al looked relived that they were changing the subject. "Anyways" she paused for dramatic effect. **"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU** **HERE"**, She yelled as she stared at Kakashi. "Wow, she has a worst temper then Ed", thought Alphonse. "Well, I need a _babysitter_", he put simply. "What?" yelled Lana as she fell to the floor anima style. "Where the HELL are you going" she asked while getting up. "Business trip", Adrian finished lazily.

Authors note:

A2: As we said last time were going to explain why the hell Naruto's here in the first place.

A1: It all began before the series when Kakashi Hatake was a young boy he met up with Adrian Fletcher which at that time was three years younger than he is. Kakashi thought Adrian strange as he had already learned the basics of the justu arts but claimed he had never been taught anything.

A2: So Kakashi brought him to his sensei which became very interested and instated him to his cell. If you ever seen the picture of Kakashi's cell, Adrian is the weird kid with the goggles. That will also explain why Adrian and Kakashi have nearly the same attitude towards life and fighting styles.

A1: That is correct! The reason Naruto is here is that Adrian had claimed that his sister Lana had discovered a way to combine Alchemy and Justu together. So Kakashi sent Naruto as an experiment to find out. So in some ways Lana is Naruto's second teacher. Any who anything you want to add?

A2: I like pancakes! Anyways please review!


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